“Oh! I meant to tell you yesterday – it did come, only it didn’t… I received one of those dreaded over-envelopes from the post office, marked on the outside with “we screwed this up, sorry” – and inside was your envelope, almost ripped in half, mangled and empty except for a bit of paper and a bit of bubble-wrap. This is why I trust the post office NEVER. Dammit”
My reply went something along the lines of Nooooooooooooo!!!!